Life is tough. I get it. Everybody knows it. But not everyone knows how to deal with new experiences. Family, love and money; these are just a fraction of the hurdles that you’ll encounter every day in your life. Sounds tragic, huh?
I came from a complicated family: I’m an only child and growing up I always felt alone. As a matter of fact, that feeling never left me and imprinted on my identity. I used to think once you are born in a complicated life, it will always be complicated. And on this sundae of life, there are always extra toppings. But it’s not similar with that luxurious feeling you get from toppings on your desserts at all. However, you will always have that “sweet aftertaste” from overcoming difficulties in life. It’s natural for us to look for somebody to be there, but that doesn’t mean someone will.
5 things that are always going to be there for you:
We tend to rely on material possessions or a handsome boyfriend to make us happy. Yeah, it probably does make life a little bit better, but you have to look at the bigger picture! A lot of the great things in life are free. When I feel down and life is too toxic for me, I look for something that can overwhelm me with a greater possitive intensity. It’s nice to think that there is always something bigger and vaster that you have not yet explored. So next time you feel alone, go someplace with a nice scenery. It doesn’t have to be fancy or costly. Maybe a park or a rooftop and tell me if it made you feel better.
2. Self nurturing
Everybody has insecurities. That’s natural. It’s hard to be confident in yourself and even I myself have struggled with this for a long time. But you can always start off with things you can do at the moment. Make yourself presentable, not for others but for you. You are the lead character in your life so only what you think of what you look like matters. If you are comfortable with it and you smell nice then that’s a start.
Look for the things that you are good at and enjoy doing. Maybe a sport, art, singing or dancing. Do it more often! Although there will be people that will be better than you, don’t you think that’s an advantage? Since you’ll find someone better, THAT means you have an example on how to improve. And maybe you’ll get better than them. Try it out and tell me how it goes.
3. Love of living things
Sometimes animals are more humane than us: they love, care, appreciate and work hard. They just live life. Have you ever found any animal that commited suicide? I bet you haven’t. Sometimes it’s good to learn a thing or two from them. Get a pet, or a plant. I’ve sought their company and I know they will give you more than enough and it will make you feel better. Even just watching them do adorable and dumb things gives you solace from allowing yourself to spiral in indefinite melancholy to Hades.
I find watching other living things live their lives baffling. They go on with their lives and they are not demanding at all: they give and take. Unlike us, we usually only take things for granted. We are the top of the food chain but yet, sometimes, we are the bottom of the living cycle.
Okay, this should be a given. This is so obvious! Who doesn’t listen to music?! Wait, what?! Music doesn’t console you? I bet you are listening to songs that only hit rewind and replay your past over and over again, huh? Well, you are getting yourself stuck in a loop.
When I say music, I mean listen to things that will move you to a better headspace, or make you groove; not songs about being heart broken and stuff like that. Dance to it, sing with it with all your might and use music as a release. Sometimes it is hard to avoid some music that your life situation relates to, but if you really want to feel better you will need to learn how.
This is the hardest part to conquer. And this was the most difficult thing I learned and even up to now, it’s hard to admit that the only person who is going to be there forever for you is you. Life gets tougher and tougher and even if you have gazillions of friends and video games, the only person who is going to move that character is you. Stop looking for your prince/princess to save you from your despair. There is no such thing. You are your own hero and isn’t it rewarding once you get over whatever you are going through right now on your own without owing anybody anything? Just you, yourself and you. Solo ride until you die, because you got YOU for life. whoooohooo! As you realize this, and you want to make yourself feel better, go back to number 1 and start again.
Or send me a message!